L: Me, Rachel, Katrine and Doris, toasting with Aquavit (Danish schnapps - literally water of life) at Katrine's going away bbq.
R: Some of my research group at the bbq.

I'll start this blog post by admitting that I'm lonely without Jeff - which is annoying as I lived by myself for 4 years before we were married and rarely had any desire to have a roommate - Dina was enough company. Luckily, I've been busy with work and martial arts and softball and various other social things so I manage to avoid sitting around alone too much. What better motivation to finish my PhD? but I still think I'll need that whole 3 months to write my dissertation.

On a personally disappointing note, I've decided not to go the world brazilian jiu jitsu competition in June as I can't sacrifice the writing and lab time to train the way I need to - not to mention it doesn't sound very practical to worry about making weight for competition while on a 10 day italian vacation. I got into competition somewhat late in my bjj career but once I started, I realized that win or lose, its a positive thing to step outside my comfort zone and test myself on a different level....even though still I hate losing (I am competitive, always have been, I just generally try to keep it in check). My performance has improved with each competition helping build my self confidence and mental fortitude. The biggest thing I've learned through competition is the importance of having the right mentality for success. Positive self talk (ie. believing in yourself), a positive mental attitude (yes, it crops up again) and the ability to know your strengths and focus on them is key for performing well generally but especially in otherwise stressful situations - jiu jitsu competitions, conference presentations, job interviews. Not only that, training in martial arts is a nice lesson in the benefits of hard work and persistence - can you believe I get better when I put in the time practicing? At the risk of sounds like those T-shirts people had in high school (softball, or in this case martial arts, is life....), I own alot of my personal growth to my martial arts training.

The Goshin girls who are great but sometimes make me feel old as they are all 5-8 years younger than me and my undergrad days are long behind me. Then again, they also remind me of how far I've come in since then - the Sex and City ladies had something when they said 30 is the new 20. It takes the whole 2o's decade to learn to be the best possible version of oneself and to be comfortable in who that person is.